NLP has taken the therapy world by storm and quite rightly so. It creates rapid lasting change and you don’t need a PHD to learn the simple skills. There are many, many trainers and training company’s pumping out Practitioner by the hundreds and it would be fair to say that there are varying degrees of competency amongst these. I certainly have been amongst those who have argued in the past that some training school are responsible for poor quality NLP training, thus sending out inexperienced practitioners into the world, free to practice in the therapeutic world of the venerable and insecure. The challenge with NLP in my opinion, is not finding somewhere to learn it, or someone to teach it, but, actually being good at it. For me, there are two factors that can influence the ability of each individual practitioner. 1) Charisma Even the most intense, most specialised NLP training course has yet to find a way of teaching this natural elegance to it’s delegates. I’m talking about the elegance that would just ease out of someone like Milton Erickson in an artfully conversational way creating major changes to the listeners’ unconscious mind. Is this a skill that can be learned? If so, how is it taught? Are there people that can never really learn this and are these people practising NLP? Yes of course they are.

They are the people who attend the courses to become therapists, yet what they really need is to see a therapist. I’ll never forget, when we first set up People Building and were emailing therapists from all areas to let them know we were on the map. One lady emailed back saying that she was already an NLP Practitioner and had been personally trained by Dr. Richard Bandler and therefore didn’t need to be aware of our services. I had to bind my hands together to prevent the temptation of emailing back “That doesn’t mean you’re any good though, does it?” 2) The Law of Requisite Variety (the person with the most flexibility of behaviour has the greatest influence over others.) I remember once when I attended an EFT seminar and met a very interesting bunch of therapists called Guided Self Healers. I don’t know anything about Guided Self Healing, so far be it from me to pass judgement on what they do, but I can tell you that they all seemed to be a bunch of nutters. I sat with them whilst they chatted enthusiastically about what number I was. They were sure I was a 9. I don’t know what being a 9 means, but I also know I am a Pisces (which this week means I’m going to meet a stranger, according to my horoscopes- how difficult can that be?!)

I’m also a Goat (Chinese astrology) right handed, visual (mainly) and blonde (naturally dumb). The thing with NLP is it’s great when you use it with a degree of fluidity. Yes, strategies can work, but a complex strategy may be run unconsciously. If you want to elicit an unconscious strategy from someone, they will become conscious about what they are doing, what happens to the strategy then? Yes, anchors can work, but if the client thinks it’s all a load of poppycock, are they going to experience the state when he anchor is tested? Yes, I’m mainly visual, but probably not when I have my singing lessons. It’s great that this stuff works, but being a true NLPer is about accepting that sometimes you get a different result to the one you were expecting, and to expect that anything else could happen instead. Lets stop putting people in boxes and expecting the norm and instead accept that actually anyone can be whatever they choose to do or be. Only then, can we practice as therapists who truly access all of our own internal resources in order to facilitate changes within the clients that we are working with. 

About The Author: Welcome to People Building, a self development company dedicated to inspiring growth, progression and better results in your life. It is our privilege to present to you authentic NLP and Hypnosis training at NLP Practitioner Level, NLP Master Practitioner and Hypnotherapy Diploma, for those in Hertfordshire, Bedfordshire, Buckinghamshire and London. We will never cease to evolve, and it gives me great pleasure, to invite you with us on this epic adventure. http://www.peoplebuilding.co.uk

We have all heard about Pavlov - the guy who found that he could condition dogs to drool by merely ringing a bell. The dogs were conditioned to associate the ringing of the bell with food. In NLP we call what Pavlov did anchoring.

If you think about it anchoring plays a large part in our lives. We all have a song that makes us feel good…or bad. NLP gives you the chance to create your own anchors and to create them in other people as well.

Imagine having the people around you associate feeling good with you! How would that change your relationships with them? How about that person you are attracted to? If you could make them associate feeling of attraction with you how would that change things?

So how does anchoring work?

Someone has an intense emotional experience and at some point during that experience a specific stimulus is applied creating a neurological link between that stimulus and emotion. A negative example of this would be a woman whose husband has died. As those who attend his funeral pass they touch her on her arm while giving her their condolences. Weeks after the funeral the woman will only have to be touched on the arm for those feelings of grief to come back to her.

The stimulus could be anything from a touch to a tone of voice (how dos it feel when that certain person tells you that they love you with that certain tone of voice?) to the tapping of a pencil on a table top. The important thing is that it is used at a certain point of the experience and that it is suitably unique when there is strong emotional stimulation so the two get associated with each other.

Let’s try an exercise in developing instant self confidence:

Think of a time when you were totally confident, you felt powerful and there was no doubt in your mind. As those feelings come back to you they will peak and subside. Start clenching your fist. Repeat this and then test it by clenching your fist. If you’ve done it right you should feel a welling up of those same emotions. This is how simple it is. See what a difference anchoring can make to your life? Imagine firing off this confidence anchor whenever you are feeling a little unsure of yourself.

You can also do this to other people. The same principles apply.

The effectiveness of the anchor depends on the strength of the emotional experience, the uniqueness of the anchor and the number of times it is repeated.

This article covers the very basics of anchoring a good practitioner course will give you many powerful anchoring techniques and applications from training to playing poker.

As mentioned near the beginning of the article imagine anchoring everyone around you to positive feelings. How about being able to anchor your boss to good feelings? Would this make a difference to your career? You bet it would.

If you could anchor yourself to states of extreme confidence power and motivation that you could then fire off at any time you wanted what would be different about your life? Imagine being able to do the same to the people around you. Would this increase you power as a business leader or manager? How about doing it to your children as a parent? The possibilities are immense.

Rintu Basu is the only NLP and Hypnotic Persuasion Trainer in the UK. Having developed NLP business applications for a number of companies, his latest venture is developing NLP in Scotland through good quality public NLP training courses.

Author: Rintu Basu

Although people do not always realize it, they can often be limited in what they can achieve by mental boundaries. These mental boundaries can in turn be overcome by positive affirmations and affirmation enhancement. When a person is mentally limited, they may find that they are unable to complete a task or goal that they are aiming for. Whether this is career progression, overcoming money problems or even passing a driving test; being able to understand and achieve your full potential can be difficult.

Very few people manage to achieve exactly what they want to in life. Those that manage to achieve everything that they want to tend to be good at entering into a dialogue with their sub-conscious and they also tend to be open-minded as far as their perception of the potential for human-achievement goes. Positive affirmations help people achieve what they want to, and live a more fulfilling life; those that are able to free their mind to the potential for physiological modeling often manage to achieve much more than those who are skeptical from the outset.

While some people may decide that they wish to achieve financial success, others may wish to find love, or re-unite with their family for example. The truth is that everyone has the power within, and the ability to absorb enough power, to achieve their absolute full potential – through using the process of affirmation enhancement coupled with daily affirmation you can achieve exactly what you have set as your goals. While goal setting is important, you should not lose sight of how you enjoy yourself on a daily basis. That is why, with experience, you may start to use your daily affirmations as a means of ensuring that you are able to enjoy yourself on a day-to-day basis, as well as achieving strategic happiness.

As people realize, our goals can often change. One day we may wish that we were able to play an instrument for example, and then as we start to learn how to play it, the fun associated with it can often disappear. This is an example of a gateway to happiness, rather than happiness itself. For example, you may wish to learn to drive; however you only want to be able to drive so that you can work in your dream job that deems that you need a driver’s license. The driver’s license is a gateway, and in fact so is the job – everyone makes goals which they set as a means of achieving happiness. Which begs the question: can you merely affirm towards happiness, rather than the means of getting you there?

The answer is no. Through merely aiming towards your end goal of happiness, rather than the strategy to get you there, you will lose focus on what you enjoy, as well as the trial and tribulation involved in finding true happiness. While happiness is subjective, using affirmations as a means to get there can be the best solution for those with an open mind.

Did you ever try to do away with a harmful behavior, only to fail? There is an extensive list of ordinary problem behaviors that people often try to alter or eliminate using self-hypnosis or NLP. The most common are: Overeating and weight loss; stop smoking; quit chewing tobacco; stop nail biting; increasing self-confidence; overcoming insomnia and sleeping better; improving memory; and managing stress.

WHAT THE MIND CAUSES, THE MIND CAN CURE:

The motivation for our behaviors starts in our thoughts. If you stop and think about it, all of these unconstructive behaviors are the result of negative thinking. In other words, you think and motivate yourself into all of these behaviors. Or at least you think yourself into feeling anxious, and that can be the origin of these behaviors. And in view of the fact that you think and motivate yourself into these behaviors, you can think and motivate yourself out of them as well. In order to think and motivate yourself out of them, you will need to know specifically how to go about doing so.

DESIRE:

You are almost certainly reading this editorial because you want the motivation to make some personal changes. And that is fitting for the reason that the first building block in the “Motivation Formula For Your Success” is that you must want or desire to change. If you have read this far, at least a little part of you wishes a change.

BELIEF IS REQUIRED FOR MOTIVATION:

Before anyone can eliminate a negative behavior, that person must be motivated to do so. Merely wanting a behavior to change is not adequate.

Our motivation comes from the things that we believe. If we believe that something very important to us will get better or “become enhanced” if we alter our behavior, then we will feel a high level of motivation. Conversely, if we believe that something very important to us will be placed in jeopardy if we don’t alter our behavior, we will also experience motivation to alter our behavior.

Some simple examples of these motivational beliefs would be:

If I take some weight off, then I’ll be able to find a companion.

If I kick my smoking habit, then I won’t have to worry about cancer.

If I stop biting my nails, then my hands will look a lot more attractive.

TECHNOLOGIES THAT CAN CREATE THE BELIEFS THAT LEAD TO MOTIVATION:

Neuro-Linguistic Programming - which is commonly known as NLP, provides methods that are able to instantly produce the element of belief. You can study more concerning this by reading the articles “How To Get Motivated To Exercise Using Hypnosis And NLP” and “Motivation Theory - How To Quit Smoking Using NLP And Hypnosis For Motivation.” These articles are both available in my free hypnosis research library.

DECISION:

The dictionary definition of the word “Decision” is making up one’s mind / a verdict or judgment. When you believe a concept that gives you a powerful feeling of motivation to make a change, you will feel compelled to make a decision to eliminate a negative behavior. Decision is the key that unlocks the door to compelling action.

ACTION:

The dictionary defines the word “Action” as an act or deed / to do or perform. Taking action means that rather than just daydreaming about making personal changes, you will actually take steps to bring about your desired changes.

SELF-TALK:

One of the many reasons that most individuals are unsuccessful at eliminating a negative behavior is because of what they say to themselves. Self-talk is important because repeatedly it is an important part of what caused the negative behavior to begin with.

I’d like you to think about this for a moment: Let us say that you want to kick a cigarette addiction. The first thing that you are likely to say or think to yourself is: “I’m not going to smoke cigarettes anymore.”

It is universal for people to tell themselves what they aren’t going to do. Unfortunately, when we tell ourselves what we aren’t going to do, we are actually programming ourselves to do it!

SELF-TALK EXERCISE:

Say the following to yourself: I can’t see blue. I can’t see polka dots . . . . . . .

I’ll bet your mind showed you the color blue, and then it showed you polka dots. That’s because when we tell ourselves what we aren’t going to do, in order to make sense of it our mind must make an image of us doing whatever it is that we would like to stop doing. And when we imagine ourselves in a behavior, our mind compels us to produce that behavior.

SUMMARY:

In order to get rid of a negative behavior, we must first want or DESIRE to eliminate it. BELIEF is the element that leads us to MOTIVATION. MOTIVATION is the drive that leads us to DECISION. DECISION is the impetus to ACTION. Neuro-Linguistic Programming is a technology that we can use to facilitate beliefs, motivation, decisions, and actions.

When we tell ourselves what we aren’t going to do, we make a mental picture of ourselves using the behavior that we want to alter. And that mental image gives us an urge to participate in the negative behavior. So if we want to abolish a negative behavior, rather than tell ourselves what we won’t do, we must always tell ourselves what we will do.

To stop smoking say: “I can live without them.”

To eliminate cravings for high calorie foods or to stop chewing smokeless tobacco say: “I can live without it.”

To reduce stress say: “I’m relaxed and calm, both mentally and physically.”

To overcome insomnia say: “I fall asleep promptly, and sleep soundly throughout the entire night.”

Worrying can make you physically anxious for example, increase in heart rate, butterflies and feeling tense. When people experience the physical symptoms of anxiety, this usually leads to more worrying about the symptoms, creating a vicious cycle.

There are lots of practical steps you can take to combat your worrying and to break the vicious cycle. These are techniques that I share with my clients at my NLP and Hypnotherapy practice in Hertfordshire.

Identify and clarify the worrying thought: Often worrying thoughts are experienced as several fleeting ideas and images that race through your mind. Spending the time writing down exactly what it is that is worrying you brings the thought out into the open. This in itself can show the worrying thought up as being less scary then when it was just in your head. Sometimes these thoughts are so automatic and quick that I will spend time at my NLP and Hypnotherapy practice, Hertfordshire helping clients identify worrying thoughts.

Explore what the worse thing that could happen would be if the thought was true: Often you will find that it is much easier to cope with a clearly defined worst outcome, then the product of your imagination, which is usually fantasy based and much worse!

Look at the thought logically: This involves examining the objective evidence of whether the thought is true. Create two columns on a piece of paper and on one list evidence to support the thought and under the other list evidence that disputes the thought. This is a process that is used at Hypnotherapy, Hertfordshire. The therapist works with the client to elicit the evidence, using a series of questions designed to help the person broaden their view of the situation.

Another point of view: Try looking at the worry from another perspective. For example, what would you advise a loved one who was concerned over the same thought. Also think about other times in your life when you would feel different about the worry.

What are the benefits or losses of holding onto this thought: Look at whether holding onto your worrying thought helps or hinders you.

Over-generalising: Are you viewing the situation/self in all or nothing terms e.g. complete disaster——- totally perfect ? Actually rate your thought out of 100% to remind yourself that your worry is probably somewhere other then complete disaster on a sliding scale.

Take Action: Rather then passively worrying which does not benefit you, look at whether there is anything you can do about the situation. Make a list of action steps that you can take.

Free time: If you are always worrying then become stricter with yourself and how you spend your time. Dedicate a set time to worrying, ensuring that within your time you set goals for action or work on your worry by going through all the steps to combat worrying already discussed. Then set dedicated time each day for relaxing - time where you will practice distracting your thoughts from worrying. Becoming proficient at a good body relaxation technique can be really useful.